Last night, oh no, exactly daybreak, I was keeping awake until around 4am. I saw the black sky turning bright, and heard the birds’ tweet  from night silence. Actually, it seems nice to feel the beginning of the day: colors of the sunrise, sounds of the breeze, and the taste of the fresh air. You know summer is in the air.

What a beautiful sight!

But in the summer of 2008 and 2009, daybreak was a real nightmare for me. Why? Because of the insomnia.

Have you ever had insomnia? If you have had, you must understand the painful experience.

During those days, I could not fall asleep even I was lying on bed for nearly 2 or 3 hours. Worse sometimes I was awake the whole night, until I saw the sunset. You can never image that, for me, how terrible the draw was! I really hated seeing the first light of the day. That meant I spent another sleepless night again, and meant I had to suffer another sleepy and unenergetic day which made me look like a patient. I tried to see a doctor and a psychiatrist and have some medicine, while still suffering the insomnia.

I really felt breakdown during that time.

I don’t know how to heal myself.

At last, I gave up trying to get asleep before daybreak, just let it be natural. I began recalling something interesting, thinking of something, enjoying the silence of the night, and observing the change of the colorful sky. I knew there was no doubt that I could attain sleep some time because there is no animal dying of insomnia. Dying of insomnia? Sounds like a joke. Try it, you will find it’s impossible.

So, then I recovered. Congratulations~

However, I still got insomnia sometimes. The difference from 2 years ago is that I will never get too nervous. Just let it be.

Let it be, when you are facing a difficult which you tried your best to overcome but always got failed.
Let it be, when you are so eager to get something and become uneasy.
Let it be, when you don’t know how to solve the complex situation.
Just let it be. God will give you the answer.